Tuesday, September 11, 2007

 

It's election day. I'm goin' fishin' ...

As I stated last month, this year's election offers slim pickings for liberty-lovin' conservatives like moi.  To be honest, it's slim pickings every election year. I cannot understand why a city the size of Nashville, with a vibrant business community and a half-dozen vibrant educational institutions, churns out unaccomplished Democratic politicos and first-class nitwits each and every time an election rolls around.

When will Nashvillians have the opportunity to vote for a truly visionary mayor?  Where's Nashville's Rudy Giuliani, who promised to get über-tough on crime ... and did?  Where's Nashville's Brent Schundler or Stephen Goldsmith, who promised to take on liberal advocacy groups and public sector unions to push for education reform and privatization of public services ... and did?

That said, I'm takin' this opportunity to announce that I, Joltin' Django, will be votin' for neither Bob Clement nor Karl Dean today. Let me explain my decision:
 
Bob Clement - When Clement was running for re-election to the U.S. Congress in 1992, he ran a television ad in which he made this statement:  "Government cannot be all things to all people.  What government can do is create jobs."  Any first-year economics student can tell you that the government does not create jobs.  The government can enact legislation that helps the free market create jobs; but the government itself has very little - if anything - to do with job growth.   Clement's ignorance 'bout a basic economic principle proves that he has no business sitting in the mayor's office.

Karl Dean - Dean Term One would in actuality be Purcell Term Three.  The last thing Nashville needs is a Purcell clone serving as mayor.  Why?  To say that Mayor Purcell has been a mediocrity is an understatement.  His only major accomplishments are dozens of unnecessary sidewalks and a not-so-subtle attempt to run the Nashville Sounds out of town.  With a Mayor Dean, it'll be same old **** with a different bad haircut.
 
Furthermore, one of Mr. Dean's early television ads featured what has to be the most ridiculous political statement in an election season chock-full of ridiculous political statements.  Dean said, and I quote: "Drop-outs who return to school should be treated like heroes."  Does that mean he wants to give returning drop-outs a big gold medal?  Or, perhaps, Dean wants to give 'em a ticker tape parade through the halls of the school to which they return.  (And what about the kids who go to school every day, stay out of trouble and graduate on time?  I mean, if returning drop-outs are heroes, what are the stay-in-school kids? Demigods?)

As for the council-at-large election, here's why I ain't votin' for none of the bozos who made the runoff: 

Ronnie Steine - Steine has a pair the size of basketballs to think that he deserves another term on the Metro Council. Anyone who's read his interview with the Nashville Scene knows that the man has been less than forthcoming about his shopliftin'/thievin' past. Do I want a closet kleptomaniac representing the entire county in the Metro Council? HELL no.
 
Megan Barry - If Barry's only half as left-wing as her husband, she's still way too left-wing for me.  I fear that if Ms. Barry is elected, it'll just be a matter of time before she goes all nutbucket and introduces a resolution to impeach the president or legislation to make Nashville a "sanctuary city" for illegal aliens.  Mark my words ...

Charlie Tygard - On his "official" campaign Web site, Tygard says he wants to "invest in programs that ... keep Nashville healthy." What the hell does that mean? Is Tygard trying to say that he wants to create programs to force the citizens of Nashville to jog and eat their vegetables?  As of this writing, Tygard has not responded to my inquiries for clarification.
 
I have another reason for just saying no to Charlie Tygard:  Tygard not only voted to allow low-rent apartments to be built in my neighborhood (despite the protestation of homeowners who feared the increased traffic and other "ailments" associated with such low-rent housing), he more or less stated at a community meeting that racist rubes were the main group opposing the construction of said low-rent apartments -- despite the fact that an equal number of black and white homeowners attended the community meeting to say "no" to low-rent housing in their neighborhood. 
 
J. B. Loring - When I was in high school, I wrote a song about our 110-year-old principal in which this line was used four times: "He's so old, he farts dust."  Whenever I see one of Mr. Loring's yard signs, I can't help but think back to my dust-fart song. 
 
Saletta Holloway - Saletta Holloway was my district councilwoman for eight years.  During those eight years, I reckon I had at least two-dozen conversations with Ms. Holloway.  I came to this astute conclusion about the, oh, second time I conversed with the woman: Saletta Holloway is a fool.  Don't take my word.  Simply ask anyone who regularly watched the televised proceedings of the Metro Council circa 1995-2003 if Ms. Holloway didn't often engage in unlearned, incoherent speechifying.  

Jerry Maynard - Maynard told the Tennessean that the best way to deal with illegal immigration in Nashville is to be "tolerant."  Yeah, that's a world-class plan to address an issue that is of foremost concern to an overwhelming majority of the citizens in this city.   Anyone who spouts leftist claptrap with that much ease isn't worthy of being elected dogcatcher, let alone councilman-at-large.
 
That said, I have news for those folks who think that I'm opposin' Jerry Maynard for petty political reasons:
 
Mr. Maynard was publicly censured by the Tennessee Board of Professional Responsibility for continuing to practice law while his while his law license was suspended for failure to comply with continuing legal education requirements. That's strikes two and three for one Jerry Maynard.

Luvenia Harrison Butler -  Ms. Butler says her top priority if elected will be "working to get full funding" for Metro schools.  Davidson County currently spends a little over $9,200 for each pupil in public school -- more than any school district in the state of Tennessee.  Metro schools suffer not from a lack of funding, but instead suffer from a misalocation of resources.  The only people who still believe that pouring more money into the school system is a good idea are union hacks and their stooges in the Democratic Party (with a few Republicans who should know better thrown into the mix as well).

Ronnie Greer - At an at-large candidates' forum on August 28, Greer said he's of the opinion that enough money has been given to Metro schools during his two terms as a district councilman; and, as the Tennessean reported, Greer added that Metro-Nashville Public Schools' "resources haven't always been properly allocated." I'm almost inclined to go vote for Ronnie Greer based on that statement alone (see above). Mr. Greer, however, is one of five district councilmen who skirted Nashville's voter-mandated term limits law by running for an at-large seat this year.

If there's one political issue about which I am extremely passionate, term limits is definitely it. (A dog-eared, heavily annotated copy of George Will's Restoration, the bible of the term limits movement, is sitting on my desk as we speak.) I simply cannot - nay, I will not - vote for anyone who violates the spirit, if not the letter of, a law that was approved, and re-approved a couple of times over, by the voters of Nashville.





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